Shalom Bombay, + kosher restaurants tend to suck

So last night we went to Shalom Bombay, the new fleishik (meat) Indian restaurant in Teaneck. Jews and vegetarian Indian food is already a documented thing , and a number of milchik Indian restaurants exist. (The history of the Jews in India's a long thing; supposedly one of the lost tribes shipwrecked there; Sadia Shephard's recent documentary deals with it in a pretty touching way.) But Teaneck's Shalom Bombay, which opened a few months ago, is the first kosher Indian fleishik place I've ever heard of.

The food was decent, although, to be honest, it didn't compare to nonkosher Indian food (meat and vegetarian) that I've had. The mixed kebab appetizer was probably the best of the meats we tried. The lamb rogan josh, chicken vindaloo, chicken jalfrezi, spinach chicken, and chicken tikka masala ranged from OK to ehh, and generally not spicy enough.

Still, it's exciting that this stuff exists, especially under such strict kosher supervision -- that even the most Orthodox among us are making use of those soy and nondairy products developed for vegans and the lactose-intolerant. And why not? Why, if we have the ability to make it, should anyone miss out on beef stroganoff (for the uninitiated, that's beef and sour cream) or chicken tikka masala -- the latter which, according to the Independent, has apparently been upseated by Peking duck as the U.K. national dish. Martin Hickman writes:

In a poll, 83 per cent of adults liked eating tangy Chinese, ahead of the 71 per cent who favoured highly-spiced Indian food. When eating out, Britons also prefer Peking duck to a lamb balti – almost a third of people have visited a Chinese restaurant in the past 12 months compared with 30 per cent who have been to a curry house.

Whatever, they just like the taste of former colonies. To wit: "more than a third reckoned their curries tasted just as good as a takeaway." Typically imperialist.

But Shalom Bombay still falls prey to the typical letdowns of most kosher restaurants. The waitstaff was rude, service was terrible, the decor hideous - and not in that way that's intentionally over the top, like Panna II Garden, the BYOB Indian place on the corner of 1st Avenue that's covered in contact paper and chili lights, that in spite of the name has no outdoor space, and that specializes in people's "birthdays."

The quality of the lamb was pretty sub-par -- very fatty. The restaurant was also terribly loud. In spite of the prices ($20 for an entree), it was more Mr. Broadway than Tabla, Floyd Cardoz's so-called New Indian venture, which operates at the same price-point. (To be fair, because it isn't serving kosher meat, its overhead is much lower; though the rent it must pay for its Union Square location has got to be a lot more than whatever Shalom Bombay pays in Teaneck).

So what's the deal? We love eating - have a reputation for it. But our restaurants, at least in the States, and even in and around New York, pretty much suck . I don't get it.